The need for forgiveness


February 26, 2009

I learned a valuable lesson in forgiveness this week that I really should have known before.

A dear brother called Monday night to ask for me to forgive him for a surly attitude he had shown a day earlier. I hadn’t really noticed — nor was I offended — and I told him that he didn’t have to apologize to me.

He gently upbraided me a bit.  ”I know what was in my heart,” he explained. “And I’m asking you to forgive me.”

I hadn’t realized how flippant or callous we can be when we slough off or dismiss someone’s need to ask our forgiveness because we’re not offended — as if it was the effect and not the intent that’s important. We can cause more distress by diminishing the apology than by offering grace. If we expect to receive grace, we must extend it.

Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. (Colossians 3:12-13 ESV)

blog comments powered by Disqus